Slurring Speech

I’m standing alongside Manhattan Beach Blvd. December 23rd waving greetoriously* to sore seated commuters in holiday traffic who are hoping they’ll make it through the intersection during the next green light… to hope again at the next intersection.  I’m waving, smiling, doing a holiday jig and blowing kisses while the drivers are either, with fixed glaze avoiding all eye contact with me, looking past me with laser-beam dismissal or waving with ear-to-ear grins joyously. Have I mentioned yet I was in a classy, far out five star Santa outfit?** The responsive-warm-ones hailed me with cheer, some yelling out, “I always knew you existed… I love you Santa…. Merry Christmas!”

Horns were honked. Little children froze in their car seats and shyly covered their mouths when mom pointed me out to them. Women gawked. Grown men:dock workers, military satellite intelligence officers… phone book distributors, accountants, and two geeky plumbers ALL gave me their version of the beefy nod and wave-with-hands-gripping-the-steering-wheel.

There I was… anonymous… in a Santa outfit… getting the same response a rock star, Obama, General MacArthur, or a superhero would. I’ll admit it, I was soaking it in. Loving it, milking it, working it.

After gigging rush hour traffic, Lori (Mrs. Claus AKA “Santa’s Helper”) and I head to a friend’s home to make a surprise appearance at her Christmas party.

For the sake of brevity I’m leaving out the in-route stories of dropping into my daughter’s Pilates Studio for a photo-op working out (as best I could with a pillow cummerbund); running into a Vietnamese Nail Salon to give the shy staff hugs and offer up a robust “Ho, ho, ho!” in my distinctive pirate accent; and hanging out of the car window like my Lab Retriever wishing everyone the very merriest of seasons.

I pop into our friend’s party, spread a little cheer, hand out a few gifts and pose for pictures with every woman in the place. Everyone loves me, I’m Santa… I’m digging it.

The next stop is a set up/staged appearance for our two granddaughters: Jacqueline (3 ½) and Annie (2). The plan was for Lori to ring a few “reindeer” bells near the house which would flush the kids out onto the lawn with the anticipation of maybe seeing Santa in the neighborhood. From the front yard they would see “Santa” moseying down the street. The plan was that, in the dark, they wouldn’t recognize that it was me/grandpa/”Aboo”*** in a costume, and I would greet them by name with a heartfelt “Ho, ho, ho!” (minus the pirate accent), promise them some gifts, squeeze in a “Jesus is the reason for the season” and then graciously move on to tend to my reindeer and head to New Zealand.

So… as planned I’m five houses down the street approaching my granddaughters who are huddled together on the sidewalk whispering to Mrs. Claus, Mom, Dad, their Auntie and friends/family (similar to watching wildlife move about from the edge of a meadow at dusk). I’m about a house away and I see my older granddaughter leap into her mother’s arms… she’s scared to death! It strikes me that with my Santa boots, Santa wig, Santa hat and Santa shoulder pads I’m probably 6’8”. I’m Hulk Hogan or Keith Richards in red velvet, a monster with a fake beard and a fuzzy hat about to pounce on her. My buccaneer “Ho, ho, ho” didn’t help! She buries her head in the crook of her mom’s neck crying, “I don’t ever want to see Santa again… I don’t like Santa”.  So much for my super star status! Meanwhile, the younger one, Annie, runs up to me… front and center, two feet away, and beneath red curls her full-moon eyes are gazing up at me in total wonderment. By the time I looked down and noticed her she’s in full stride, boldly standing there in exhilarated-run-together sentences with fast-forward age appropriate slurring of speech she gushes out,  “Santa, Santa, Santa, I love you... you’re awesome Santa, Santa, I love you, love you, love you” and somewhere in all of this I heard the word “Tink” mentioned. I knew she was referring to Tinkerbelle, for she had been talking of nothing else for 64 days. She wanted Tinkerbelle! Tinkerbelle anything: sweat shirt, doll, coloring book, ring tone, dress, DVD, shoes … anything “Tink”.

Standing in the presence of Santa, her young heart free to express itself safely, she gushed searching for and finding every word she had that could speak of her adoration… and desire. It was desire… yet her marveling reverence was predominating.  It was a moment she wasn’t going to miss and I didn’t want to end.  Annie was putting it all out there. It was innocent, it was sweet, and it was as pure as anything in this life… the perfect meritage of love and longing.

I said goodbye, they all headed indoors, I headed up the street looking for a sleigh. Alone I started weeping. So in love, so very, very happy and longing/aching for my first moment in His presence in exhilarated-run-together sentences with fast-forward age appropriate slurring of speech…

– Craig McConnell

* So… is it really a crime to create new words? 

** While I was in Australia with the Ransomed Heart Team Lori and her girlfriend Leah spent a snowy week designing and sewing the certifiably authentic Santa outfit. We’re talking a work of beauty… the whole enchilada… lined coat, white gloves, fur topped boots et cetera.

***When my daughter was expecting our first grandchild I got the harebrain idea that the kids ought to call me “Captain”. I thought it would be respectful, fun… Craig…unique. The best laid plans of mice and men… So, Jacqueline was born and a few months later she decided I ought to be called “Aboo”… it stuck.

Comments

[Vern Hyndman]

I dig the Santa thing... its instinctive for most folks, to remember the longings of being a kid... Santa just brings it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XL2cSwXKVE

One of these days, we'll fly together.

Riding doesn't make us free, it just reminds us that we ARE... and Santa doesn't create desire, he reminds us of the desire buried in us.

Mix the two, and well... I'm not sure what it is you get... but it looks a lot like me on a bike with a Santa suit.

I think that a lot of what we find, on our journey, is what God has had there the whole time.

-vern-

[Sallie]

"the perfect meritage of love and longing" Oh may we be so wise, to be so fully the 'all of everything' He has made us to be. Your tears were contagious, your 'snapshot' of such deep delight compels my heart.
Write on, brother, and thank you!

[Drew Hampshire]

Another great vignette from your life to bless us! Thanks Craig, I can totally see you doing these things, and I'm so glad for the experiences you get and then share with us. Your blessing is ours as well!

[Craig McConnell]

Vern... Watched the video you linked... I like the bike, I could see Santa on a bike. like the outfit... looks like Santa. But what's with the black hair? Santa doesn't have black hair... You're not Santa... whadda ya trying to pull here?

In little Annie I was captured by her worship and pure hope/desire. My purest truest desires self identify in praise. When I'm worshipping God, adoring Him, capture by His majesty and His heart for me... the Larger Story, grace and the beauty of the Gospel I find my deepest/truest desires surface and find their order.

[Craig McConnell]

Sallie... Thank you. - Craig

[Craig McConnell]

Drew,
Thank you. We all love stories... we all have stories. It's our story/stories that people love most about us. - Craig

[charlie]

I wanna go next time...

[Craig McConnell]

You better watch out, you better not pout, you better not cry...

[Rick Schaller]

Craig,

Thank you. Everytime I feel God nudge me to "check out" your blog, you have put your heart out for all of us to see, and it always speaks to where my heart is at that moment. For so many right now it is difficult to even look for God in the midst of the times, but you have brought us back to what is the core of our heart...not these times but our true joy of walking (or in my case falling to my knees)with him. May we all shine that light for others as you do!

Blessings to you brother.

[Uilleam]

Aboo???.....as in Peek?

If I had only read this before I saw you at the outpost last week, I would have been merciless. I do love your heart, though..."to hope again at the next intersection..." I'm putting that on my dash.

And geez, leave it to Vern to go deep.

[jill dyer]

i love the eyes with which you see the world. it helps me breathe a sigh of relief at times. relief that it's not just me, that it's not too good to be true. oh, i know this in my heart of hearts...but the reminders are precious and help me keep my sword high. thanks, craig.

[Craig McConnell]

Uilleam... I knew someone would ask, and of course… there’s a story.

The family-"urban" legend is that it has something to do with a character in Disney's Jungle Book. "Aboo" is some kind of a primate... okay... a monkey!

Some, mostly outsiders, have wondered if it’s an abbreviation of the Greek god Aboothemenadokus, the ever-young, always wise, strong, courageous, classic rock fan and warrior-poet protector of warm tropical beaches. While compelling I must claim another story.

Your hunch is actually close to how I got the name “Aboo”. When Jac (Jacqueline) was just an infant I would often, pop my head up into her field of vision and with affectionate grandfatherly warmth say "Aboo!" as you would say/use the fuller phrase "peek aboo". For months I frequently interacted with her in this loving playful way. As time passed my daughter had a picture of me on the refrigerator, and Jac, while being spooned some Gerber's Pea Custard pointed to the picture and exclaimed, "ABOO!!!” My daughter chose not to respond, "No honey, that's Captain... Captain, that's Captain", and instead, with affirming laughter and smile said, "Yes, Aboo... yes, Aboo, that's Aboo." The rest, as they say, is history. And so now my second granddaughter calls me “Aboo” as well as a few friends, my accountant, the mail man… my only salvation is that the kid across the street calls me Aboothemenadokus, while the twerp at Starbucks calls me “Monkey Man”. I’m Craig to you!

[David Felts]

Hey Craig,
I love it...when I starting reading this, I could actually see you doing that. Your ability to have fun was one of the things I enjoyed most about you at bootcamp. The only better would have been to have put a picture so we could all admire the hard work that went into the suit.
Dave

[Amy@ Joy of my Heart]

LOL!! I loved reading your Santa stories... LOL!!

Loved it! Brought a smile to my day this morning...

Bless you!

Amy

[Craig McConnell]

Jill,
Glad to be a reminder-er. I’m surrounded by reminders and still I forget… or things become opaque, foggy, removed. Spiritual amnesia is the all too common undiagnosed syndrome I suffer from, from time to time. I forget God, I forget His heart for me, that there's a Larger Story, who I am, that love is enough, I forget that my heart is good... and yours is too! I forget what's true, Act IV, that my help doesn't come from the hills/economy/community, that I'm an Image-bearer, that I'm a man, that God is awesome, majestic, holy and worthy of my life/worship... (I'm actually going to cut my writing short here as my mind is moving faster than my fingers... and I want to stay with this thought personally without sounding redundant in writing.) Thanks Jill

[Craig McConnell]

Amy... as you did mine!

[Tim Wright]

Hi Craig,

I was listening to you on The Ransomed Heart Podcast about you knowing that you are a writer. And you and John went on about the hard work of coming into what Jesus is calling out of you. That was so good. Would it be possible for you to respond to this via e-mail as I need to have someone to help me walk through what Jesus is doing in my life. I listened to you on Breakthrough To Purpose and was encouraged by your heart.

Thanks

Tim

[Russ]

I love the contrasting emotions of Jacqueline and Annie. One fearful and wanting to hide, the other full of love and expectation. Interestingly, it's the older child with the fear. Why is it that "maturity" produces more fear? I'm sure her reaction made you want to pull the beard down and reveal your true identity, while the reaction of Annie made you want to keep it on so as not to spoil her joy and surprise. We live in a world of conflicting emotions and reactions and our response to them can make all the difference in how God's presence is revealed to us each day.

I don't have a point with any of this, you just gave me something to think about. Thanks, Craig.

[Rob]

Craig

Thank you for sharing this.

I was a Santa for almost 20 years. I started in a department store and then did family things, corporate events and charitable events as well.
I loved being Santa Claus and am so familiar with the duality of having one kid think you are the greatest thing ever and the next that would rather run in front of a bus than sit on your lap. I learned one day that it is most often from parents who tell their kids for weeks that Santa isn't going to bring them anything because they have been bad, and then all of a sudden expecting them to be filled with joy and come tell me what they want for Christmas.

Kind of like some of those old Sunday school stories about how God will strike you down if do this or trying to use God as a tool to teach proper behavior and then not understanding when the kid doesn't want to go to church.

But that's not even what I wanted to write about.

Of course one of the things about being Santa is that I'm a big guy. When I was at boot camp in September of 2003, God told me that my battle to fight was that of my weight and food addiction and that I was to lead other men out of the shame and physical problems that being 100 or more pounds overweight can cause.

I wish i could say that I have let go of all the weight and have fought the battle well. I am still fighting but the battle wages on and on - it is a struggle. But I am fighting today with other men as my support and as a band of brothers.

But what I can say is that i did finally hang up the Santa suit. It got to the point where when i put it on It contained all the shame and hurt of my past and all the weight that i had lost and put back on over the years. I didn't hang it up in agreement with the devil - that I didn't do good things as Santa Claus. I raised thousands of dollars for charity and brought smiles and joy and laughter to so many children. But it became time for me to let that go and take care of myself

[Craig McConnell]

Rick… Thank You! Because of these times I’m finding myself paying less attention to fear-mongering media and more time “on my knees”… otherwise I’m toast (taken out). May we walk well, worship passionately and love courageously. - Craig

[Craig McConnell]

Russ - so many things shape our reactions/responses to all that pops up in front of us. Good thoughts.

[Craig McConnell]

Rob/Santa... Well done! May God give you all the strength you need to be victorious in your battles for life. Thanks Rob for your response. - Craig

[huiles de poisson]

Hi...
I loved your santa stories. Indeed good work. I like that.