A Son of Zebedee

Jon, my son-in-law, is my wingman.

A wingman is the man who is covering your tail, an extra set of eyes guarding your vulnerabilities. The mission is effectively accomplished because of the teamwork between a pilot and his wingman.

I’m the pilot.

Our mission is to rescue the hearts of a group of men with the beauty, power and truth of the Gospel.  The plan was for Jon to fly into Denver from LA early Wednesday morning to give the two of us a full day to connect, get caught up, go over our notes and run a few errands before we leave for Toronto at 5 AM the next morning. There was a lot to get done. Unfortunately Jon had to do the United Two Step… his flight was delayed several times, with different reasons/excuses given and then finally cancelled. In a rare moment of customer awareness and competence they finally got Jon on a flight, gave him a 1 oz. bag of nuts, a 4 oz. serving of diet Coke and landed the plane (with his luggage on it!).* 

Our day has vanished, my plan skittled leaving me frazzled. I rush north to Denver International to pick up my wingman in one of those wouldn’t-it-be-nice-if-days-like-this-never-ever-happened godless moods.

“Godless” in the sense that something in me is ranting and raving about  life not unfolding in the comfortable, pain and hassle free manner I demand.

“Demand” in the sense that all poor reactions have at their root, core beliefs about God’s goodness and what brings life. My reaction, like the “idiot” light on the car dashboard, indicates some governing world-view is being thwarted/challenged. (Note James 4)

A good time to take an inside look is when life turns unpleasant. In such times we become one of the Sons of Zebedee who approach Christ with the demand, “I want You to do for me whatever I ask of You.” (Mark 10:35).

I wanted this day, with Jon to go a “certain way” so that… this conference, with Jon would go a “certain way” and that when the mission is over I’d feel a “certain way” about the conference, myself and life in general. “Jesus I expect you to do for me whatever I ask…”

As I drove I was aware that all is not well internally. I put in The Daily Prayer CD*, which a recording of John Eldredge praying the prayer that many of us pray on a daily basis (It’ll change your prayer life). I’ll often meditate on the words as I’m driving around, pausing it at different points to linger with my own prayers and reflections. 14 seconds into the prayer there’s an acknowledgment of God being sovereign. I stop the CD and allow the idea of God being over all, in control, the sovereign God counter the sense I have that all of life is chaotic and fully out of control… that this mission is a mistake and so am I.

It was great. I traversed into a reflective spell pondering the overwhelming reality that it was God who put this entire trip together: it was God prompting Tom, our Canadian host to invite me, his suggesting that I bring a wingman, God suggesting Jon as my wingman … that God is going before us preparing the men for whatever unfolds… that He, God, would use this mission for some purpose in our lives! 

And the question surfaced was, “Given God’s sovereignty, what could happen that we couldn’t handle?”

Lose my notes!?
“It would be a relief… finally loosed from my dependence upon them I would be free to share my unanchored heart/soul.”

We miss a flight!?
“That’s simple… it’s an act of God for which we have no control, and actually might be fun.”

Jon and I are somehow separated!?
“Yeah and so? We’d make it together eventually, and if not? What a story to tell in the years ahead!

We crash and die!?
“Lori’s rich, I’m in heaven… what could I have done?”

We crash and don’t die!?
“What a story to tell in the years ahead!”

The men hate me!?
“Hey, I’m just the messenger.”

The men love me, hoist me on their shoulders and worship me as some god!?
“What a story to tell for years and years… and years”

It’s at this moment I find myself veering off the interstate and mistakenly onto a highway headed the opposite direction.

I’m thrown out of my meditative state now facing a circuitous detour and tardy arrival with even less time to get everything done! Immediately I respond will a variety of “French” expressions.

Then another question rises and quickly tempers my reaction… “If God is sovereign, is it appropriate to be profane when you make a wrong exit while musing about his control over all things?”

I crack up. How quickly my response to disruptive undesired circumstances reveals my governing beliefs about his sovereignty!

– Craig McConnell

* Excuse the cynicism… it’s hard being a frequent flyer these days!@#?

Watching People

I’ll admit to a vivid imagination. It keeps me entertained, humors my friends, endears me to many and is the cause of sporadic troubles.

I enjoy “People Watching”*… you know, sitting on a park bench, in a mall or at a sidewalk café watching a parade of God’s glorious and funky creatures…  kinda like bird watching except with people. 

So, I board my flight from LAX to DC on my way to Zurich early (to get “situated” into my assigned seat stow my carry-on stuff; arrange my water bottle, head phones, iPod, journal with a 0.5 mechanical pencil in the seat sleeve; get my gum out and pray that God has sovereignly kept the seat next to me vacant).  Sitting on the aisle in the forward compartment of the plane I view everyone pass by to their seats. As I often do, I wonder/imagine what each person’s story is.  So much is seen in our countenance, our body language, eyes, and the posture of our soul.

I wonder what each traveler is leaving behind or headed to… what hints/clues to their story does their furrowed or furry brow tell? I note the wide range of smiles, styles, scowls, hairdo’s and don’ts, smirks and body shapes; their ”look”,   accessories, their gait, weight, demeanor…  it’s a virtual circus of lions and mice, glorious and broken… unfinished men posing and hiding; woman both beautiful and abused.  Each one with a story and a wound… sometimes hidden, sometimes worn on our “sleeve”.  We are a varied, odd, complex and beautiful species. 

So we’re wheels up and on our way.

Is it just me or have you noticed the phenomenal of people changing over the course of a long international flight? Somewhere over the ocean we cross some portal… some seam,  a contour, a line where something significant changes… it’s not the International Date Line, but some kind of a personality/character-time dilation-warp-speedo-change-eroonie thingamajig were people are transformed rather quickly.  The 300 or so passengers leaving DC were by far your typical looking Americans.  The gal across the aisle from me was a house wife from Winnemucca off to visit an old college friend living in Switzerland, the guy next to me … a loud businessman from Maryland intending to seal a deal in Geneva.  At some point during my sleep aided nap we crossed that line and everything was different. The economy section was now the Hofbrauhaus, Munchen. It seems the whole plane was speaking German. They’d all morphed. The gal now looks like an alpine farm girl with a handkerchief pattern dress, braided hair and a hearty Béarnaise accent. Mr. Businessman now looks like an old world silver haired clock maker in a frazzled wool vest and wire rim glasses. It’s amazing. I was surprised no one was yodeling.

I arrive in Zurich and spend the next nine days teaming with our Swiss allies in the adventure of launching the first Swiss German Boot Camp. It was fascinating, astonishing… wonderful, and life changing. A number of times I simply cried with the joy of witnessing the birth of something dangerous, wild and good in Europe.

For over two years Ruedi, Peter, Hansjakob, Andrian and Gerd had been following God, investing blood, sweat and tears**  in pursuit of the desire to awaken the hearts of Swiss and German men. Man did they! God came big time. I was so very proud of these men. They’re knuckleheads just like our team: a businessman, physical therapist, a teacher, chemist and a retired professor… and each living in a story far larger than they could have imagined a few years ago. Just like our team.

God calls each of us to be someone we’ve never been… it’s who we truly are.

 God calls each of us to do something we’ve never done… it’s usually the very thing we’ve always wanted to do but never believed we could. It’s what we were made to do. Until we do it, it’s all talk… dreams, hopes… potential… “Woulda shoulda could’ves”.

There comes a time when you gotta get up and get out on the dance floor.

And as we leave the comfort of the chair, the security of the wide well traveled path for the unique path God has for us we’re changed. It’s some kind of a personality/character- God-authored-transformational-speedo-change-eroonie thingamajig. It’s God. Following Him we’re changed… dramatically at times.

When I left Switzerland nine days later these men were different men. They’d been on the dance floor. They’d pursued their dream. They had a new look; countenance, an affirmed strength, a validated gifting, a tested and found true heart. Spring had come for them and they were full bloom.  This wasn’t my fanciful imagination.  Our Swiss friends became kings of a new domain, leaders in the Large Story of what God is doing in Europe. It’s was amazing. I heard angels yodeling.

– Craig McConnell

 

*Urban Dictionary definition of “People Watching”:
1.People watching is when u go around and watch people that u've never met before and, based on their actions, movements, and gestures, guess what kind of people they are and what they do.2.When people with no lives or losers who go out to watch people because they nothing better to do.

** They came to several of our Colorado Boot Camps, the Advanced Camp and flew out for a weekend given to conversation, prayer and developing our relationship. In our interactions, prayers and discussions there was a strong sense that God was orchestrating our relationship and this mission.